This is a long awaited post and I have to say that I was waiting because I wanted my husband to share his portion of the story, but unfortunately he is out of town, so he'll have to edit later if I get it wrong!
Growing up I was always surrounded by children. My younger brother is five years younger than me so I was always a little mommy to him. I loved helping in the nursery and toddler classes at my church and as I got into my teens I became a teacher of a little girls class on Wednesday nights. I was always babysitting, helping in elementary classrooms at school, and assistant directing children's Christmas and Easter productions at church. I have known for such a long time that I absolutely loved children and all I wanted to do was be a mom. So, off I went to college to become a teacher because I figured until I could have children of my own I'd just love and teach other peoples kiddos.
About 20 miles away was a young kid named Zac who was learning about himself too. Around the age of 16, I believe, he was going through some tests and procedures and was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis. CF is a disease that affects the lungs, liver, pancreas and intestines. It is usually found before birth through genetic testing. The life expectancy of a person with CF is in the early 30s. Many males become infertile due to this disease. Can you imagine being 16 years old and told that you probably will never have children?
Now fast forward to 2005 when Zac and I met. Almost immediately Zac learned how much I loved children. I remember the day he told me that he had CF. He told me not to look anything up on the internet because he didn't want it to scare me. Of course that would make anyone even more fearful! All I remember is pleading with the Lord that if Zac was to be my husband that he would heal him and keep him with me for a long time. Once Zac's parents met me and learned of my love for children I know their hearts broke. They remembered the fact that he may not be able to have children and their hearts were heavy for us.
Over the last few years I honestly never even thought about the fact that we may not be able to conceive. I had determined two things in my heart:
1.) That my husband has either been healed or misdiagnosed.
2.) That the Lord would not have put such a strong desire and love for children in my heart if he didn't have a plan for us to be parents.
We had enjoyed our first few years of wedded bliss and loved our freedom with each other. However, the baby bug started hitting me once a few different families in our church were beginning to announce their upcoming bundles of joy. Zac, however, was really enjoying his freedom and wasn't ready to give up some of the things he loved just quite yet.
I remember it well--Sunday July 6th after leaving his parents house late evening he stopped to the drug store to buy a few things while I stayed in the car with a headache. When he came out he seemed to be hiding something. I asked him for the receipt because we were trying to keep better records of our spending and he wouldn't let me have it. I was so mad at him. I couldn't think for the life of me what he could be hiding from me! Once we drove into our apartment complex I was anxious to get home and sleep away my headache, but he drove down to a parking spot by the lake and turned off the car. I just looked at him and asked him what he was doing because I really wanted to go home. He said he just wanted to talk to me about something. I'm thinking...oh great...here we go. I've always thought the worst whenever he says something like that!
He tells me he has been doing a lot of thinking and the only way he could explain to me what he was going through was to give me something. He then reaches down between the seat and the car door and pulls out a box of 2 pregnancy tests. I was completely shocked! Then I started crying...really bad! Everything that he had been saying over the last few weeks, like not being able to stay out late anymore, or go on vacation by ourselves anymore, or losing a lot of sleep, etc. started coming to my mind and I decided I wasn't ready to give up that freedom just quite yet either.
I know...duh Amy. You're husband just said he's ready to jump on the baby boat with you and you retract your dream!
I cried all that night, the next day on and off, again the next day on and off and finally by Tuesday night I told him that if he was really serious then I was glad to start trying. Well, I started looking up all the information about when during the month I was most likely to conceive, etc. So, we started trying and just left it in the Lord's hands.
We went to Branson, Missouri July 20th-27th to teach a children's ministry during the Evangelical Church conference. One day we were in Kmart shopping and I had on a purple long cotton dress. I remember walking around and rubbing my belly because it felt a little pudgy that particular day. Zac said something to the fact of "quit rubbing your belly like that or people will think you're pregnant." We just laughed about it. The whole trip I was so tired...I slept everytime we got in the car for a drive. We came home and got back into our normal routine.
The last week of July I realized that I was "late". Trying not to be too anxious I decided to wait until I was 7 days late before I took a test. We talked on Friday August 1st about taking a test the next day if nothing happened. Of course, all night long I tossed and turned just thinking about it, so I got up early Saturday morning and snuck in the bathroom to take a test. After the 2 minutes or so...nothing. I threw it away and went about my day. I babysat a little girl, Allison, for about 8 hours. I came home and as I passed by the garbage the pregnancy test caught my eye. There were two distinct lines! After 8 hours all of a sudden it was a positive test! I could not comprehend that it would even be right. So, I took another test and it immediately showed up positive. I started crying and just wanted to talk to my husband.
Here is where I feel really bad: I called my husband and asked him what he was doing. He said he had just gotten off of work and was in the grocery store. I started crying and he asked what was wrong. I just blurted out through my tears "I'm pregnant!" To this day, he will tell you that all of a sudden he was completely lost in the aisle and couldn't find a single thing he was looking for! He came home and I was still crying! We hugged, we cried, we laughed, we danced. This was the moment we had waited for!....and not the way I had intended to tell him!
We decided to tell our family the next day and then our church family/friends the next week. I went to the local health department for an official test and they confirmed everything. All together I took 5 tests...4 at home and 1 at the health department! I was in complete shock so I just kept taking tests! :) The health department went through all the general questions and information and gave me my due date of April 5th, 2009. They then told me that conception most likely occured on Saturday, July 12th, 2008 (Ryan and Keely's weddding day...thanks guys!). Did you hear that? July 12th. We had finally decided on July 9th to start trying! That was 3 days! The Lord is soooo good!
If I can come across it I will post the powerpoint presentation that we used to tell our church family of our exciting news. We spoke our testimony about how the things that Satan intends for evil the Lord intends for good. We told Zac's story of CF and proclaimed the healing of his body and miracle of a child to come! I believe that day Satan was defeated in this aspect of our lives!
Who knows how many children the Lord has planned for us, but this little man who is about to grace our lives is our Miracle! We know that the Lord has BIG plans for our family and this little man! We've already given him to the Lord and can't wait to see his plan for bringing him into our lives. We are anxious to meet him as his due date is 26 days away! Our lives really are going to change dramatically so very soon, but we are so blessed and so humbled that the Lord has chosen us to be Reese's parents.
Praise the Lord! :)
